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What the heck am I doing??? =?
What do I really want to do? I keep hearing people talking about careers and their choices and their mistakes. Mostly I have heard them saying Law School is a choice they somewhat regret. What does that do for me and my choices and resolve?
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Am I holding onto that dream because it gives me a path and takes away that "big, black nothing"--the answer to what I want to be and where I am going? What do I do if I don't go to law school in the next few years? What if I go to Law School and do a lot of work while I am there?
Do I want to do Social Work, like NYU offers as a joint degree program? Where would I work? Should I still apply now and defer my entrance? Can I do that?
Where should I work? I know I want to take some time off between undergrad and law/graduate school. But what do I want to do? Where will I go? If I move to Chicago, like I keep proclaiming and desperately want, will I make it? Can I survive it? Where would I work? What kind of work will I do? It kind of excites me to think about and wonder where I will be, but when I think that this time is near (less than 1.5 years), then it frightens me. I have to make a choice. I have to know where I am going because what will I do if I have nothing at some point?
Where can I find these answers? How do I begin to invest in my future so I can be ok enough to survive and be able to do the work I want to do?
And today? What will my blueprint be? What am I doing on my campus this year (from now until May)? Can I do it or anything at all?
I don't have the answers. I feel YP4 is giving me some resources, but the questions are still there, and daunting, and scary.
Law School tickles my fancy sometimes, but what am I really talking about? Do I know what I'd be getting into? I love thinking and analyzing. I love my major because it deals with such concepts as critical thinking, negotiation, conflict resolution, communication, word choice and framing, persuasion. All of these are a critical aspect of law and legal work.
And I have my passion for doing good and right by humanity, and the same dreams to change the world. But...
Seriously, what the heck am I doing? and where am I going?
- Bernardita Yunis's blog
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